Rough Night, Tough Decision

Firstly apologies for not posting last night. I had it all prepared but then…well, snow happened. Only a little, but that was enough to mess my evening up. Oh yeah, it was over in a few hours and the roads remained clear by the end of it but does it matter? Of course not. At least not in England because, and I’ll let you in on a little secret here, England cannot deal with snow whatsoever. I thought the problem would be getting down to the bus station in time because the ground was covered in slush and there was a decent chance of breaking something if I wasn’t careful.

But no, it turns out that was the easy bit (I did slip several times though) because despite the fact my bus departed on time, it then proceeding to be stuck in traffic for TWO AND A HALF hours. I’ll say that again, this time in bold so it really sets in; TWO AND A HALF HOURS. 150 minutes trapped in a seemingly endless line of traffic. We wouldn’t move for twenty minutes, finally get moving only to freeze in one spot again. It was the most depressing journey ever. The fact I was on the top deck of a double-decker just made it worse because I could see how little progress we were making.

It was so bad I couldn’t even get angry at the stupid drivers dropping their speed to at least 5mph under the limit. People, the roads are clear. A little damp but perfectly suitable for normal driving. Essentially I either gave up or started kicking and punching things. I went for the former and went to sleep.

Then, when we finally arrived in Durham, I found out that I had just missed my bus by seconds. And the next one wouldn’t arrive for 30 minutes which is a lifetime considering I would only be on the damn thing for three minutes. So instead of waiting and letting my impatience and frustration grow until I did something I’d regret, I decided to walk.

That wasn’t the tough decision in the title, by the way.  Not that it wasn’t a hard trek, what with the black ice, freezing wind, uphill journey and lack of street lights making it a somewhat unpleasant experience BUT there was a trickier choice requiring my attention (that is why I didn’t post so yeah, sorry about that).

What do I do with my job?

You see, there was next to no snow and yet I was late getting in and as I’ve just explained, super super delayed in getting home. Can you imagine how much worse this is going to be when you know, we actually have some bad weather? It affects my precious alone time twofold because I’ll have to get up earlier (meaning I’ll need to go to bed sooner) and I’ll probably get home later too. Suddenly the six hours I have to do my thing is reduced to three. I can’t be having that. My writing has already been restricted through working as the only time I have is the weekend and usually I spend that time winding down from the last five days. And remember, the whole point of getting a job like this was to support me financially while I focus on my writing career. This plan hits a snag when I don’t have the time to write my novel or even write for the gaming website (I’ve become part of a different site now but I’ll talk about that later).

Furthermore it isn’t great for my employers when they can’t rely on me to be there on time. Especially around this Christmas period when less staff are going to be there. Keeping tabs on my times isn’t going to help matters.

Consequently I decided last night to resign from my post. It was only a three-month rolling contract but it was still a tough decision to make. I enjoyed working there, I liked the people and without another job lined up I was reluctant to give up before my time ran out. I’m not a quitter but at the end of the day I have to put my happiness first. Life is too short, as they say, and it isn’t going to help my mood or my writing prospects if I’m spending all my time filing.

So it’s over. I’ll be turning up tomorrow to pick up a few things but that is it. I spoke to my boss today and she kindly told me that I didn’t need to see out my notice, meaning Wednesday was technically my final working day. I explained the commuting problems and that was that. I’ll say my goodbyes and head home. It hasn’t been easy but it’s something I had to do. I will take the experience (and the money, don’t forget about the money) and move on.

What is the next step?

Well in the short-term there are three main steps. A) Getting back into my writing, B) helping out with the house and C) looking for work closer to home (10 minutes away would be ideal, if that is possible). Whether it is full-time or part-time, I’ll be happy. So long as it is enough to keep me going financially without restricting my creative side it’ll be perfect.

Then in the long time the aim is to get my writing out there, through my novel or game writing, and of course getting back together with Vanna again. That’s pretty important to me too. If only I could combine the two…admin work in Minnesota perhaps?

Wish me luck!

Cheers

Alex

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