Why Is It?

…that you always lose at least one semi-important thing when you move house? It seems to be a generally accepted truth that some items will disappear during the switch between your old home and your new one; an inevitable conclusion to transporting all your possessions from one place to another in one, probably stressed out, anxiety-ridden, trip. It might be a box full of toys that goes astray, or a small lamp, or your treasured photo albums…anything is a potential victim (except sofas and beds, as you really shouldn’t be misplacing those, and if you have, well, you’re beyond help) in the Russian roulette that is moving house.

But, you know what? I question this…this myth. I don’t believe in it. I cannot understand how things can completely vanish off the face of the Earth when you move. No. It doesn’t make any sense.  You empty your house. You fill up an empty van. You then empty that van and fill up your new house. It is a very straight forward operation. Yet it seems like everybody I know (and from that, I can assume everybody else in the world, because sweeping generalizations are entirely infallible) can recall at least one thing that they haven’t seen since they left their previous home. Most of them are probably still searching for items that they will never ever find again. Hell, it has happened to me on several occasions. And, frankly I’m just tired of it.

The first time I moved it was my Star Wars Stormtrooper gun. I’ve never watched the films, and I can’t quite remember how it came into my possession, but I loved this gun. It made two different sounds, people. In those days that was virtually unheard of (or at least it was for me, as all my other guns just made one, solitary pathetic noise).

The second time it was the miniature screen I had for my Xbox. You attached it directly to the Xbox and you didn’t need a T.V. Granted, I didn’t use it much, but that weekend when Halo 2 came out and I had no television? It was the hero of the hour. Thanks to that baby I was able to complete the game before Monday. If that situation came about now I would be lost I tell you, lost.

To be honest, I’ve always suspected that my dad is the culprit behind these disappearances (he has, let’s say, a tendency to chuck my stuff out) but as he hasn’t said anything about these items (he usually admits he is guilty), I’ve never been able to fully prove it. Either way, I was determined for it not to happen when we moved to this house. I packed up all my stuff and labelled the boxes carefully. I brought as much of the stuff with me as possible, and made sure to monitor everything else that instead went with the removal van.

And it seemed to work. All 6 boxes of mine are in the garage, while the rest of my things went into my room. But somehow I’ve lost stuff. Not really important stuff, but things that Vanna has given me, and things that I require for my trip to the U.S. Nobody has thrown them out, nobody has stolen them…so where are they? I’ve went through the garage at least five times without success. The next step is bringing the boxes into the house one by one and completely taking them apart, but I’m skeptical that doing that will work.

So, my friends, where the hell do all these things go? Is there a possessions stealing goblin who hides in every removal van and pinches items that aren’t essential enough for you to panic about them, but valuable enough for you to question where they have gone (and go mad trying to find it?).

Ugh. I spent an hour today looking for the items on my missing list, and I didn’t find a single one. Not impressed people, not impressed.

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